Kindness Uplifts: Lessons from a Fledgling Hummingbird
“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.” – Dalai Lama
Kindness is a powerful healer. An act of kindness, whether intentional or “random,” will brighten everyone’s day. Here are different kinds of ways to support kind behavior:
Be joyful: Not particularly feeling like being kind to anyone? That’s precisely the time to seek out joy to give yourself a “bootstrap boost.” Offering kindness then becomes easy. Recently, outside my kitchen window, I watched a mother hummingbird (who I named “Lady”) build a nest and give birth to a hummingbird chick (who my husband named “Zippy,” and who graciously posed for the attached photo). Over the next few months, we both watched Zippy grow, molt and stretch his wings until he was ready to fly. The process was amazing and made us smile each day. I was happy and felt joy every time I watched Lady feed Zippy or when Zippy would try, pre-flight, to stretch his wings. Their progress each day, sometimes each hour, naturally elevated my mood. The world is filled with such opportunities for joy: really look around you, discover the treasures that are always within your field, replenish your cup, and let it overflow so you can share the excess as kindness with those around you.
Be complimentary: When you see someone, say something nice. Like me, I’m sure you’ve heard the old cliché that “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” Recently, I told a person that “the color of their pretty eyes exactly matched their clothing;” they responded with a smile and said the compliment “made their day.” When, unexpectedly, someone tells me during the course of my practice that “you have calm energy,” I respond with the same reflexive smile - that compliment makes my day too. It’s so easy to say something uplifting rather than any of the dark, distancing alternatives. Raising the frequency and vibration around you by offering a compliment is such a simple way to show kindness.
Lady feeding Zippy
Be open-hearted: Rather than having a tangential connection with people in your life, try really getting to know the person you are chatting with. Let your authentic presence become a kindness present. Try to understand their journey. There is an unhealthy trend for “silent and low contact” connections between family and friends who may sometimes be difficult; this is certainly not reparative but rather increases any pre-existing stress and negativity for all involved. Stay open-hearted when distance and disconnect surfaces, learn how to repair, understand and show compassion. Resolution and resilience happen when you understand and forgive. It is important and fulfilling to be supportive of each other as we move through life, especially for those for whom receiving support does not come easily. This is an especially loving way to show kindness.
Be open-minded: During President Lee Bollinger’s final commencement speech at Columbia University in May 2023, he focused on telling graduates to stay open-minded. Intolerance and close-mindedness may be part of human nature but don’t let that be your default when interacting with people. Realize how complex our world is, listen to opposing views, be curious, show intellectual humility and, above all, be empathetic. Be flexible as bamboo. A strong and open mind makes for a strong and healthy body. Let your emotional flexibility guide you to show kindness.
Be positive: Instead of dwelling on what didn’t go your way, who didn’t meet your needs, what past abuse or trauma continues to emotionally and physically cling to you, try taking small, therapeutic steps to release the heaviness of the body memory. There are many options for whole body healing: a partial list would include acupuncture, cupping, hand magnets or other energetic treatments, somatic bodywork, massage, EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing), hypnotherapy, EFT (emotionally focused therapy), NLP (neuro-linguistic programming), talk therapy, inner child or dominant and non-dominant hand journaling, and/or prayer, exercise and healthy nutrition. Learn how to thrive despite all of the old and new challenges and traumas. One way is to always count your blessings, and to realize that, despite your own issues, you can still be a blessing to others. This is a meaningful way to show kindness not just to them, but to yourself.
Kindness is a powerful healer. This is something that everyone who considers themselves a healer comes to know. As an acupuncturist whose practice has now spanned decades, it is certainly something that I have come to believe. It may be a big ask in today’s world to operate from a place of heart-and-mind openness, to ferret out the joy hidden around us, and to be extra complimentary and positive, but the rewards for doing so are enormous.
Susan Shane has been a licensed acupuncturist for over three decades, an author, a college adjunct faculty member, continuing education instructor, wellness lecturer and an advisory board member for a large hospital’s Integrative Medicine Center. Her passion is to empower and support clients with their own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. Susan strongly embraces the notion that kindness is always possible.
Website: vitalityfusion.com
Books: Vitality Fusion, A Comparative Interactive Survey of Western, Chinese and Ayurvedic Medicine, Second Edition and Balanzing: Korean Hand Therapy Using Acupressure and Bio-marked Magnets.
Media: Promoting and Protecting Naturopathy (6/26 ANMA podcast), Mantra Yoga + Health Magazine, Thrive Global Magazine and much more.